Wednesday, February 24, 2016

Permission Granted

The Wizard of Oz
One of the biggest changes for someone coming out of the spectrum is a newfound ability to choose. The paralyzing, inflexible I'll stick to my routine and follow every rule at all costs thinking fades over time. Choices turn the sepia world of Kansas into the colorful, glorious land of Oz.

But while the ability to choose did ultimately present itself in my life, I ran into another unexpected snag and that is, I didn't feel like I had any internal permission to make any of these new choices. 

Internal Permission? Yes. I realized that as we journey along in life, we need people to inspire us, embolden us, encourage us, and to push us forward. Externally we need to hear the voices of others tell us, "You can do it. It's okay." Eventually, their voices become internalized and finally they become your own, so in any new situation you might want to try but of which you are unsure you can say, "Hey girl, you've got this."

And honestly, I have no idea why we have this need...but...we do.

I realize it when I get up in the morning and the weather is awful, but I want to be healthy. I don't get in gear until I hear my friend's voice in my mind say, "Go for your walk! You can do it." Permission to be healthy, granted. Or when I'm faced with meeting a new person, "She might be the most interesting person you'll ever meet. So go have lunch with her." Permission to make a friend, granted.

In the end, choices are the pieces that create the mosaic of our lives. Choices, even wrong ones at times, lead to emotional and even cognitive freedom (our brains heal and grow when we choose to do something over nothing). They create opportunities to explore life, help us to live in wonder, and cut down on our ability to presume that we will know the outcome of any given situation. Really, we don't know what will happen until we try, so...just try. Permission to be uncertain, granted.

This is a total aside but here's some permission to color in your Bible.  This post/idea looks awesome! Now, for some people in this world, to do such a thing is blasphemous. But I say grab those highlighters and make some art magic out of scripture. And while you're at it, put the radio on, sing at the top of your lungs, and even if, like me, you look like a drowning victim while doing it, just dance. It's fun.

Permission to live. Granted.

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